COME AND SEE ME — ANYTIME

You know you never know how your day will unfold when you rise in the morning.   God has an agenda for His children (those who have given their lives over to Him), and we have no idea of how we’re to participate in His plans.  But He has an incredible way of “inviting us” to join Him in what He is up to.   More often than not, He uses people to bring opportunities into our walk in life.

The phone rang this particular morning with a friendly voice at the other end.  It didn’t take him long to identify the purpose for his call.   The caller was involved with caring for his long-time Sunday school teacher.   This man was handling the affairs of a woman who had mentored him as a young boy, through teaching him in Sunday school.

I felt it strange that he would phone me, because although my husband and he were work associates at one time and I was surprised that he wanted to talk with me as we really were not connected at all.

His need became clear as he went into the details about his friend and her current need.   She was 95 years of age at the time and because of her specifics needs she had to be relocated to our town, and she was being moved away from the facility near this care-giver and his wife to our town some 40 miles away.

This couple loved this woman and had taken care of supervising her financial needs and would regularly visit her weekly.  They were very caring and tender towards her.   But now that she would be residing in a care facility several miles away, it wasn’t going to be convenient to just drop in for a visit.   His concern is that she was now alone, and knew no one in this new location.

He wasn’t phoning to ask me to visit her.  He simply wanted to know if we had any program at the church where we were on staff, where people would visit those who were resident in assisted living facilities.  These ministries are often referred to as the “Stephen Ministries.”

I listened intently to what he shared with me about this woman and what her need would be for a weekly companion visit.   We did have this ministry at the church, but I felt that I wanted to hear and know more about this “loved lady” in order to be able to share more carefully the details of her need with someone who was involved in this outreach. 

After talking about the various areas describing her personality, her interests and background, I began to think aloud with him.   Sometimes it’s very difficult to connect people together without a first-hand, in person encounter with them.

Our conversation was so pleasant and inviting, the idea came to me that I needed to meet this woman so I would have a better idea of who the Lord would have to connect with her.

This friend told me the address of the facility, her name and room number.   Turns out, she lived only about 3 miles from our home.  I shared with my friend that I thought it would be helpful for me to visit her and access how the connection would be with “someone else.”

Several days later I drove over to have my first visit.   Sometimes I’m at a loss for words, but a smile and a hello is a great start.   When I arrived at her room and walked in, she was lying in her bed.  She seemed fully awake at the time. 

I introduced myself, and said that we had a “common friend” who had called me to share that she was new in the area.   The conversation with her was one-sided……….as I did all the talking.   I didn’t know for sure if her lack of speaking was due to a stroke, or if it was the medication.  She would only mumble in response to my words.

It’s so wonderful that the Lord knows just how to orchestrate events and present ideas to us that may seem out of the ordinary. For this first visit, the idea came to me to bring along our 7 pound Pomeranian.   I thought that might ease the conversation as most people enjoy little dogs.   Our little dog was very calm and well-behaved, and remained in my arms.

It took a moment or two for this lady, Marie, to notice that I had something furry in my arms.  I asked her if she liked little dogs.  All she could do was “mumble.”   Before I knew it I was bending over and placing the dog next to her in her bed.  Immediately this woman came alive!

As I think about it now, it was a risky venture, but worth the risk.

A few minutes later I lifted the dog away and just continued to try and make a one-way conversation with her.   She began to smile and I knew I was on safe territory.  

Not long after that I told her that I would stop in again next week.  She continued to “mumble incoherently.”  But somehow I understood that my presence was accepted. 

All the time I was there I was thinking to myself, who do I know that would be just the “right person” to befriend this lady on a regular basis and become a part of her life.  

After about 20 minutes I felt it was time for me to leave. 

No, I never referred her to the ministry.   She was to become “my new friend.”    When I phoned the man who called me about this woman’s need, I told him that I felt the Lord had located someone to visit this lady.  It was to be me.

Each week I would visit, and it seemed that I was beginning to learn how to have a complete conversation with her, even without her saying a word.  I remember thinking that I’ll just talk with her as though she understood me. 

It was now the beginning of summer, and each time I visited, she would either be in bed or would be sitting in her wheelchair watching television.   One day I took her blanket off the bed, wrapped it around her legs and off we went…..”outside.”    I would take her around the neighborhood in her wheelchair.   She seemed to just “glow” during this outing.

One time I took our little dog with me on this neighborhood tour and placed her in Marie’s lap as she was sitting in her wheelchair, and off we went down the street.   Then the “miracle” happened.   I heard her beginning to speak.   I could hardly believe my ears.   No, she wasn’t speaking to me.   She was speaking to our little dog as she gently held and petted the dog during the entire outing.

Each week her words became more understandable.   Once she began to speak, she never stopped.   She never went back to mumbling.

This relationship went on for about 3 years.  Each week I would come with goodies to eat, or bring my little dog for special cuddles and walks in the neighborhood.   

I remember one time when I went to visit “Miss Marie” she was in the social room.  Everyone was sitting around playing a word game.   I entered the room with our little 7 pound Pomeranian, Abby.    Miss Marie perked up immediately and held out her hands to hold our little dog.    What I didn’t expect was that ten other people in the circle wanted to hold this furry friend as well.   The visit was longer this week, but it was worth every furry moment.

The Lord was about to move us to a northern state.  I missed my little friend so very much.   Within that year, I believe, she was moved back to an area where this couple would be close at hand for regular visits.

I would like to close with a poignant thought that I had one day as I entered the assisted living facility.   My parents lived some 2200 miles away and I had always wondered if, when they needed help in their senior years, who would be there to help them.   I lived so far away from them; and wondered why the Lord was allowing me to befriend Marie when I was so concerned about how my own parents would be cared for.

To my surprise, the Lord would be arranging that for me about 10 months later.   Yes, I became privileged to care for my Dad and to later have my Mom in my home, full-time for almost three years.

This Miss Marie was a treasure to me.   And one day, I’ll get to have a wonderful reunion with her in heaven.

She taught me in a very quiet way, that a smile, a hug and little visits can change the course of your day, your attitude and your heart.

Someone asked me one time, how can you enter a Care facility and make a difference.   My response is always the same:

It’s not about you…..it’s about loving on others with a smile and a little pat on the arm; and allowing the Lord to take it from there.

Just walking into each person’s room at these facilities and waving with a smile can make all the difference in the world…..their world and yours!