Finding balance in our values, priorities & activities
My Mom used to say that whatever opportunity came up in school my hand shot up before I ever knew what the task was. With that in mind, I’d like to travel back in time and invite you into my heart.
Once at a summer camp volunteers were being sought. I still had the “hand–…itus” disease. Camp organizers needed someone to attend to the John at the camp. At 15, this sounded interesting, until I was escorted to my new assignment. The John was the “boy’s bathroom.” I was not a happy camper, but it was the beginning of toning down my “enthusiastic willingness.”
So, in tandem to our will, emotions, and thoughts, in our life journey we are accompanied with three external constant companions: VALUES, PRIORITIES, and ACTIVITIES.
They function as guides dictating our interests and involvement. As with any journey, it is always helpful to start with knowing our true NORTH. Once Jesus is set in our hearts as Master or Lord, He becomes our North, and our three travel companions then prepare us for our life journey.
However, if our bearings are NOT taken with respect to Jesus being our NORTH, there is no doubt we will actively wander aimlessly all over the map. For many years, my true North was rooted in activity.
Recent advancements in technology have simply made our busy lifestyles busier. What once was merely a means of decorating our façade has become all–consuming and overtaken many lives. Many are actively yet fruitlessly living for God’s purpose and His kingdom. In essence “Activity doesn’t mean productivity.”
A quote from an Experiencing God devotional puts it this way:
“One of the great challenges of the Christian life is determining what God does NOT want us to do.”
Perhaps, like me, you have said “yes” even before someone finished asking you to do something. On the surface I was extremely active. I was the human dynamo, and boy was I busy. However my life was empty – and barren.
At this time in my life I found great fulfillment in being busy and needed, and of course there was always something to do! My entire being moved from one commitment to another, and relaxation was out of the question!
My need to be needed overtook my life, and my precious family fell to the bottom of my priority list. My quiet time with the Lord simply became a checklist item – another event squeezed in-between other responsibilities. My activities, like weeds, were choking the “life and relationship” I needed to have with God.
It was during this time that God allowed and used difficult circumstances to get my attention. One day while lying on the sofa because I was literally burned out, I heard a Godly man on the radio speak about the “busyness” of life. His concluding remarks brought me upright on the sofa:
“If you’re too busy to pray, you’re too busy!”
I was troubled and knew I needed to make some changes. God helped me realize that I had allowed the needs of others to orchestrate and dictate my life’s responsibilities and activities. I finally saw that just because there were needs, I wasn’t the one destined to meet every one.
I had struggled with saying “yes” to God’s assignments, and “no” to others. In my mind it was because I wanted to help and be involved in others’ lives, but in reality the activity was filling a greater void in my heart, and that often was at the expense of my home and health. How often had I done things to overcome my own insecurity – just to be recognized, praised or included?
God’s Word wonderfully and powerfully helps us see through the “lens of His eyes,” His perspective. Sadly I saw that I was saying “yes to everyone, but Him.” I was allowing “the need to be needed” to dictate my real responsibilities and priorities.
It was then, God brought my focus to my day–timer which allowed me to identify how my schedule would align with His plans for me.
God began with my attitude about serving Him. He helped me realize I had been working “for Him” and not “with Him.” It was through painful discoveries that I found that I had it backwards. “My” calendar was full of tasks and plans, and then generously sprinkled with requests to God to bless them. I had been just too busy to listen to God – often merely reading His Word and then closing the book.
At the time, my heart cried out: “God, I can’t seem to see you and detect your activity in my life.” God used a stranger on a radio to point this out. Only then was I ready to hear some wisdom in the area of “listening to and for God.”
This stranger said that if I wanted to hear God’s voice in my inner being, I NEEDED TO TURN DOWN THE VOLUME OF MY LIFE. If God had wanted to contact me, my busy life would have returned an “all circuits are busy,” message, and His call may have ultimately gone to “voice mail.” God is usually not in the habit of shouting above the roar of activity with which we surround ourselves.
My busyness had taken on a life of its own, and needed constant attention to stay afloat. Hardly ever taking time to just “breathe and relax,” my mind was continually preoccupied. The continual flurries of activity never ceased, and were rendering me spiritually fruitless, I realized that I was the only one responsible for eliminating them.
It was at this time that God got “down to business with me.” Since God is more concerned with character rather than connection, His methodology seldom uses instant gratification – you know, the very heart of Social Media.
My continual “pedal to the metal” life had been creating a roar of activity through which I could barely hear His voice or feel His gentle promptings. I understood my need to “eliminate distractions” bulldozing me to the point of overload, and soon I was spending more time in my daily marinating time with God, and my day timer started to take on a “fresh new look.”
Basically it’s learning to walk “with Him” and not “ahead of Him.” This meant asking God to sift through the requests being made of me, and allow Him to indicate whether I accept or graciously decline. These passages were the start of that journey:
Scripture Proverbs 4:20; Proverbs 3:6
“Ponder the path of your feet, and let all your ways be established.” “In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”
We live before an audience of One, and like you, I want to hear His “well done!” In essence, God’s cares more about who I am BECOMING, rather than what I am doing for Him. When my insecurity finally allowed me to understand that He adores you and me – just the way we are … warts and all. He wants us to be fruitful, thereby eliminating our need to continually post on social media.
Alas, social media maven, Annie All-together, who spends hours daily posting her every move so that her 985 “friends” can stay updated on her perfect, put–together life is simply not living in reality.
If our desire is to please our Lord and hear from Him, we do not need to do everything. If we were, we become like the performer who has to keep multiple plates spinning lest the plates come crashing down. Why? He is simply trying to impress others.
Like books, our lives should have margins – space to give our eyes relief from constant words. Life margins are needed so we won’t become overwhelmed and overcommitted.
In a 2011 sermon titled, “Rest God’s Way,” Greg Nance said:
“In his book, “Margin,” author Richard Swenson describes modern society as so over-committed and over scheduled that we have no space left for rest. He went on to say that as a society, we’ve forgotten what margin is. In the push for progress, margin has been devoured. He describes margin as:
‘…the space that once existed between ourselves and our limits. It’s something held in reserve for contingencies or unanticipated situations.’
“As a medical practitioner, Dr. Swenson was seeing a steady stream of exhausted, hurting people coming into his office. He says that a majority of them are suffering from living without margins.
“Margin is simply a byproduct of living in sync with our Savior’s schedule according to the Scriptures. To find margin we need a Messiah who gives us instruction for both labor and rest.”
I am convinced that Satan’s easiest tactic is to “keep us distracted and too busy,” so we don’t have time to get our life in line with God. Once we are correctly positioned with our True North, God provides us with our individual GPS or GOD’S POSITIONING SYSTEM. However, like the phone app, God only gives us one instruction at a time and waits until that is done; then you receive another instruction.
What is clear now is that “If I’m too busy to pray…I’m too busy.” After God, my family should be my first priority. As appealing as ministries and opportunities may sound, if not instigated or orchestrated by God, can easily overwhelm us. By taking time to talk to God about our activities and involvements, we give Him the opportunity to “influence us….our heart and mind.”
Consider what happens when we consume garlic, we don’t need to announce it! It “oozes” from our pores. Similarly, being in the center of His “direction” allows us to ooze Jesus into everything we do. We’ll be “contagious with Christ.”
I have found some very helpful and practical “sieve questions” that I pour through whatever I’m asked to do. I’d like to share them with you:
- Has God asked me to be involved here?
- Has He said anything about this in His Word?
- Do I have a quiet inner peace about “doing whatever?” Or, do I feel pressured to do it?
- Will this involvement be in keeping with His priority for my life?
- Will this involvement take me away from family responsibilities/priorities too much?
- Will this involvement keep me too busy to have “quality time with Him?”
- If you’re married, is my spouse “on board” with me taking on this commitment?
- Is this in keeping with my “giftedness?”
These questions give me a “clear idea” of whether I should say yes, or no. I love God’s kindness in helping me recognize this and reduce my self-imposed stresses. I am still learning the “disciplined art” of saying “yes” to God and “no” to any activity He wasn’t asking me to join.
My calendar is in continual transformation, but since His working in this area of my life years ago, my day timer and clogged spiritual arteries have taken on a new and refreshed direction. My activities and priorities look different, because He is helping me to evaluate them from His vantage point.
You can finish this sentence: If we don’t come apart and be with Him … there’s a good chance we will simply … fill in the blank…………
To summarize this process of uncluttering our hearts, let’s look again at our three lifelong travel companions – Values, Priorities and Activities, in light of putting Jesus first in our lives:
Our VALUES determine our PRIORITIES;
Our PRIORITIES determine our ACTIVITIES;
Our ACTIVITIES determine our HEART-BEAT
So, how is your calendar looking? For Whom is your heart beating?
Cups of Cold Water 